Today, marks 8 years since my life was radically changed. It was this day that I realized two things::: Only God could love me wholly and perfectly, and there was no mistake I'd made that was too big for forgiveness....and it's the same forgiveness He'd want me to have with others.
I celebrate this day because prior to this I wasn't really living... I was a slave to me and my selfish ways and years of doing things our way clearly wasn't working. At this point in my life I thought I'd be a 21 year old divorced single mother who would have to live in shame and guilt of ruining her own marriage..... But God....
He wasn't done. And He meant it all for good. He had started a work in my heart and my husband and was orchestrating these series of events that would lead us to Him.... Repentance and each other with a love newer and purer than before.
A couple weeks ago I sat in a room full of women and told my testimony and I vividly remember every tear I cried when I thought I'd reached the end, and yet it was just the beginning.....
There is power In the Gospel that came to save us and make us new and give us new hope....
Here's a psalm I wrote to reflect a "New me"
Lost, Broken, ashamed and guilty
It took me a while to understand that's not how you see me
You saw me then and at my worst ,
You loved me first
And in that love and that pursuit,
I finally understood
All that I looked for and needed was YOU
A love that gave me a new name
A love that came and took my shame
My past long gone, a new beginning
My biggest failures and hurts were not my ending
You told me to trust you and follow you
Afraid of myself and what I had broken,
I surrendered my life and said I do
Darkness no more, the veil was torn.
You called me chosen
My path to you now open
You then began a work in me
To rid me of me and make me free
My life since then is not mine anymore
I lay it all down for you to restore
Though you don't rush, you want it all
No part remains untouched no matter how big or how small.
Creator of the universe and yet lover of my soul
My Redeemer My Savior My All in All
I want to live for you always and bring you glory
Live fully surrendered
And let you write my story
Use all that I am my future and past
Remind me of your faithfulness and promises
To them hold me fast
No matter what comes,
I want to choose you.
To hold your hand and never let go.
To go where you lead and dwell where you are
To know I lack nothing, you've brought me this far
Much more than I could think of or even imagine
What you hold is better
What you offer is life
Whatever I wanted or thought that I NEEDED,
In you I have found it.
In you, I am completed.
Love,
Meli
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