Meli's world

I started 2019 in Colorado! Seeing snow for the first time, enjoying friends who became like family. Hopeful for what lay ahead. Optimistic at the word that would describe my year: overflowing! I welcomed my thirties surrounded by love and my husband throwing me the greatest surprise party yet. and though I don't mean to sound like some ungrateful brat that complains and whines, looking back at almost half a year now I cannot seem to find this "overflow" of joy I thought I'd be experiencing. To be honest, its been quite the opposite. That kinda going through the motions- trying to smile at life- hoping no one asks me any questions- type of feeling. And what's even scarier? That up until now, I never knew what that felt like. What's even more puzzling? I didn't even realize I felt this way til a few weeks ago I sat in church and as I prayed about so many things troubling my mind, it came to me. In a song. I started humming- and in my head sin