Moving Mountains

 

I tried to write this while we were in Trinidad last week and I was inspired by my surroundings. Mountains!!! Something we never see in Florida. It's funny cause just a couple of days before that I heard Usher blaring somewhere and I remembered what I considered my favorite song at one point ::: Moving mountains. You know the sappy love-break up R&B song??? 





About 5 years ago I could relate to everything that song was saying. A love gone wrong. The bad taking away the good.

lyrics from Usher's "Moving Mountains"

Trying and trying and nothing seeming to work. I really contemplated divorce at this point in my life. My husband and I had been married close to 6 years and had a baby boy. We were struggling to make it out of my parents house and everything seemed to be a fight. I don't know looking back I felt a lot of resentment for entering marriage so young with nothing, struggling to find an affordable place where we could feel independent and my struggle of feeling one of us had to go to school yet live to survive.

 

 

We were at a place where the routine, the problems, the frustrations, the lack of privacy and even lack of money were plaguing our love. I was angry. He was angry. We had no time to ourselves. We were both adjusting to becoming parents and attention from others outside of the marriage was starting to look attractive to us both. We couldn't see the good, we couldn't see how it would get any better and struggling apart seemed more peaceful then fighting and arguing.

 

I looked at those mountains and I saw how grand, and big they are. How could any one think that mountains could move? Yet God's word tells us that our Faith could move mountains. Except I was in a place I had no faith. I knew God was there and marriage was supposed to be so much more than a commitment that could be broken but I wanted to quit. I didn't know how God could fix a mess so big or how I could only see and feel love for my husband. But in that mess, God in His grace grabbed a hold of my heart and my husband. Somehow at the same time. For me, God showed me the mess I was responsible for..... what I had done to hurt him, or show indifference, or the times I didn't make an effort to support him as the provider, not being his suitable helper. He showed me how I was capable of even contemplating love elsewhere and in that moment I knew that if I could be responsible for so much damage then I could forgive as well. My husband was sorry. I was sorry. and this time it wasn't just words. God opened up our eyes to where we ACCEPTED Jesus this time in a way I don't think neither of us had either done before. This time we accepted HIS forgiveness because we saw the SIN and MESS we could make without HIM. We needed a miracle, we needed faith and we both needed to Forgive if this marriage was going to work.

 

And of course,  by now you know it has WORKED. But its taken WORK. Work like I never thought possible. But God not only let HIS grace and forgiveness invade our lives, but He also let His love pour out freely from HIM into us. He started molding us into the husband and wife HE wanted us to be and as we started forgiving and working together, we saw each other as team mates, something no one could tear apart. We started looking at our marriage as a covenant with God and each other rather than a commitment/contract that could be broken. He took of this blindfold we both had on to each others great qualities that made us best friends to begin with and instead of speaking negatively we began praising and admiring those qualities. We know what life can be without God, and we never want to be there again. God showed up in our lives and showed that unlike that Usher song with no Hope, HE was bigger than our mountains. And restored something I thought was broken without repair. I love my husband now more than ever and I wouldn't recognize who we were, what we did or how we thought without Jesus. All We know is the MOUNTAIN can move. And that our marriage is something to be nurtured and worked on daily.

 

It's a work in progress. A daily decision. A love the pours and overflows from God into us and though us as we come together in FAITH and in the name of JESUS. Two imperfect people that require forgiveness often. 

 

Today, I encourage you to look at that mountain and instead of seeing something so big, start seeing how small it is in comparison to God, our Creator. He created the mountain, He could make it move. Perhaps your mountain isn't a marriage, but whatever it is let God speak into your life and show you the mess that you have made. I promise He can Forgive, Clean up and restore like no other, but its all in us admitting we can't do it alone. He loves you too much to let you be stuck on one side of the mountain. I pray you are encouraged today in your faith, in your relationships and in knowing what is impossible to men, is possible with God. The mountain can move, and what's behind it is something you never have imagined. - Love, Meli