There is so much for me to learn about contentment. Believe me , I'm still learning. But the amazing thing is that for so long I thought all I wanted was to be happy. To have this beautiful life full of prosperity, and pleasure and free of suffering. The pursuit of happiness.... The one many of us embark us.
Happiness comes from your circumstances. You can be happy when your account is full, when your bills are paid, when you're fed, when you have a vacation planned, a bigger house.... So what happens when that's not the case? Are you then sad? Or do you still have this joy in you to keep you going?
So many times in life we are looking for the next time to bring happiness. Instead of enjoying singleness, we think we'd only be happy if we were married. instead of enjoying the married life, we think we'd only be happy if we had kids. instead of enjoying our jobs, we'd think we'd be happy if we got that promotion. But truth is if you're not enjoying where you are now, no matter the situation, you won't be happy when you reach your next goal. Contentment is not a feeling based on our goals, accomplishments or possesions. It is a lifestyle of gratitude and peace no matter where you are in the journey. Happiness and being in that eternal pursuit of it, that's a heart issue.
Where is your heart? Where does your joy come from? There was a point in time being married young with good jobs and income for teenagers, and having our own apartment, I should have been happy. and yet nothing ever seemed like enough. I bought new furniture, got a puppy, got a promotion and became supervisor at the age of 18. Yet I never felt it was enough. then I became pregnant, and felt finally this would be when that happiness would come. Don't get me wrong, my husband and marriage were great yet it always seemed my heart was not satisfied.
After becoming pregnant, and having our lease come to an end we were forced with the decision to move in with my parents to be able to afford our son and all the new baby expenses and hopefully move out in a near future. And as I said before, that's where the struggles came. It took me not being in my apartment, with our own privacy and space to appreciate it. It took me having to quit my job to take care of my son, to appreciate the opportunities I was given and the money I was making. And somehow, in a crowded home with only one room for a family of 3,and having to share the kitchen, and never really having our own friends over, I was able to find peace. It was never more I wanted.
The satisfaction and yearning to be happy I had, never had anything to do with having more, or being more. It was about not having truly known the God who created me and the reason I was created, As humans, we are always looking for more. We are creatures after our own will, habits and "happiness". We can try drugs, sex, money, positions, attention, fame and always be left wanting more to make us happy. But I came to this point in my young life at 20 years old, where being let down by close family and friends, and facing some of the worst betrayals, I knew the happiness I longed for had to be more than just my marriage, motherhood or "friendships". Through dissapointments, heart break and feelings of failure, I had an encounter with God. I found out Jesus was enough and was the fulfillment I had been searching. He healed my heart, restored relationships and changed my perspective on life and success and happiness.
Our unhappiness and satisfaction comes from our perspectives. When I thought I deserved more, I worked hard, I did things right, and did not value what I had I became unhappy, bitter and always looking for the next thing. Knowing now that Jesus died for me so I can live an abundant life and discovering His grace, which is all undeserved, I can be content in any situation. My happiness is found in HIM.
Today, we have come far from living with my parents. We now own our own house and have great stable jobs. We have learned to appreciate the life we are given, our kids, family, time with each other, without worrying so much about how much money is in the bank account. There are always times when things are great and we are able to do more and then there are times that we have to cut coupons, search for sales and only get the necessities, but now I know I can be content in any situation!
"..........for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. ""Philippians 4:11-12"
Comments
Post a Comment