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my #TBT....

The above picture was taken in 2011 when Emeli was just 1 month old. It was one of our first family pictures as a family of 4 and also our first date night after having her. I found this picture today while looking for a throwback picture to post on facebook.  I remember being so scared having another baby. She was not in our plans... We were still living at my parents house and didn't have things in order. I was scared of another c-section, of not being able to provide, and of not being able to split myself between Manny and her. Silly fears.... Almost 4 years later, I gotta say looking back at what God has done is one way to remain grateful. I can sing of His goodness forever! The C- section was less painful than I imagined and I went home on the second day. We bought our first home just a couple months later. God has made all the numbers and finances work. There is a love that has been multiplied in my heart for both my Em & Ems. And seeing Manny become a big broth...

A letter to my son......

Emmanuel, Manny, Manolo.... You turned 7 yesterday and I can’t believe how fast the time has gone. It seems like just yesterday we were bringing you home from the hospital in your preemie clothes that we now have on a teddy bear. It seems you were always determined to do things your way, coming into this world 5 weeks before your due date. We were not expecting you so early! Yet instantly you gave me courage and made me brave enough to have the c section I never wanted. None of the fears mattered at the moment. Only having you here safely in my arms. When you were first given to me, and I placed my eyes on you, I discovered love. I was forever changed by seeing your face, feeling your tiny 5 pound body, and being your mother. It has been the biggest blessing and privilege God has given me. Everyday, my thoughts, my actions, involve you and your wellbeing.  I know most people thought we were too young, but dad and I were convinced we wanted children. I prayed everyday I’d ge...

Ahhhhhhhh!!!!

As I sit here an write this on my lunch break at work, I realize its the first lunch break in a while where I'm not running errands. I started so strong in my lunchtime walks, and then things just started coming up and well they just were no longer my priority. I realize life gets so hectic and all I want to do is scream sometimes:::: ahhhhh!!! This was the same thing that was trying to keep me from making it to church last night. I rushed. Got the kids dressed and fed but after rushing around, several tantrums, I was exhausted and just didn't want to go. I didnt want to go to the thing I needed the most : God's presence... Worshipping Him and taking my mind of everything that stresses me, and just getting into His word hearing what He had to tell me. Thank God I have a husband who promised me he wouldn't let me skip church service anymore. I find that before I knew Jesus, I was always trying to do. To accomplish and boasts on my academic achievements or awards...

I said yes.......

I said yes.... and no he did't just propose and its not a big rock on my finger. Its actually the ring we bought 10 years ago on his Checker's (fast food restaurant) salary. It is real gold and has real diamonds, but I had to laugh at the fact we picked it out inside Kmart's jewelry department. Its funny someone asked me about the other day since I still wear it on my right hand from time to time... and it just dawned on me, that was our "engagement" and "wedding ring" for a long time.  Today is not our wedding anniversary. Today marks 11 years together. It was Friday the 13th in that warm February that we became more than friends. It's also kind of ironic that I name titled this blog "I said yes" cause on this particular day that we celebrate every year, I didn't actually say yes. Nothing was asked. He had actually called me that Tuesday evening to tell me he "liked" me. The week progressed by me telling him I did ...

A lesson with Emeli- Character

I know its a bit of a change from the usual Lessons with Manny, but I do have two kids. And just because she is 3, that does not mean that there's nothing from me to learn from her. Or at least to be reminded of things. Before I sat down to write this, I was in my room charging my lap top and going through some things in my notebook, when all of a sudden she got really quiet. She was in my room going though my drawers when all of a sudden she is no where to be seen or heard. I got up and she wasn't behind my sleigh bed. Instead she was in my closet. Wearing my heels. She'd gone in there so quietly closed the door and was trying on all my shoes. She seemed so surprised that I caught her in there. She seemed to thing if she was quiet enough and she did it behind closed door, no one would know. Of course, I wasn't mad. She looked so cute and told me she wanted slippers like Cinderella. I was more concerned she'd get hurt but I had to take a picture of this little ...

No walk in the park.....

The other  day as I went on my daily lunch time walk around the neighborhood of my job, I took a picture of the scenery in the shopping plaza and the sidewalks and streets ahead of me. I thought to myself this is definitely no walk in the park. I am sure I look silly in my medical scrubs walking around alternating between power walking and jogging. Its definitely gotten easier in the past 3 weeks but its still not something that I desire to do. I desire to get fit and healthy. I don't have a specific size or number on the scale but I know that I want to be healthy. However, with the end result in mind, I must do things that are not easy, that are not comfortable, that are not what I prefer and things that I may not like. Growing up as a kid my only job was to do good in school and do my chores. Those things came easy to me. I don't know why. I never had to study, I didn't find school challenging. Even doing my chores which consisted of doing dishes, making my bed, an...

My Big But.....

yes But. My big But... maybe not one but many over and over again. Today I turn 26 years old, and if you have wondered why I haven't written much in the past couple of weeks, its because I have something that i have been working on. Something I need to tackle. Something I need to conquer. Its funny how something that's never bothered me much at all could have crept up on me and affected me so much with one step on the scale. My weight is out of control and I need to stop it, before it stops me. I have struggled with weight issues, body image and just being used to being called "thick" and "big" since I was in middle school. Problem back then was that I wasn't big.  I was bigger than most girls I went to school with and my sister, but looking back to how much i weighed, i was not overweight. My problem started then. I had a family who I don't think meant any harm but would always tell me  I was big, I was gaining weight, I had big thighs...etc...